I was thrilled by the twists and turns of events in the World Cup Football Final 2022 between Argentina and France, beginning with Messi’s first penalty kick and followed shortly by a goal to the credit of Di Maria. I was impressed with the sheer determination of the Argentina team to win during the first half. With 2-0 in her favor, Argentina shifted to playing not to lose in the 2nd half. However, a goal from the penalty kick by Mbappe of France at the 80th minute followed by an almost immediate unexpected goal also by Mbappe at the 81st minute changed the entire atmosphere. Unable to contain the joy or disappointment, my neighborhood shouted and screamed in the middle of the night. In the extra time, Argentina switched gears to attack again and scored another goal. The French did not rest on their laurels and matched a goal with a penalty kick to even the score. As we know by now, Argentina finally emerged as the winner on penalties.
The switch from play to win in the first half to play not to lose in the second half nearly cost Argentina the World Cup. While it may be the strategy not to rock the boat and to play out the time, the defensive play seemed to be fueled by an over-confident and complacent attitude.
How do we play in our game of life? Do we play to win or play not to lose? In his autobiography, Love, Pain & Money: The Making of a Billionaire, James Caudwell claimed to be competitive and always plays to win.[1]Obviously, with his accumulated material wealth, he has emerged as a winner and successful by world standards. He does not stop counting his blessings but shares his good fortune as a philanthropist. Hence, play to win encompasses living out life using our talents to the fullest, reflecting and recollecting what is important to us, finding meanings and purposes of our life, sharing our blessings, and making the world a better place.
On the other hand, play not to lose adopts the status quo attitude impeding growth. We are often dismayed and frustrated over stagnation in our career and economic progression because we understand the danger of becoming redundant and obsolete and eventually being pushed over by competition, not unlike Argentina in the World Cup final. Hence, holding on to our position with no growth is not good enough. Furthermore, living a life catching up with the Joneses, oblivious to the needs of our neighbors and environment, is self-centered and exhausting. It is not real growth. On the other hand, life is fulfilling and meaningful when we seek change and keep abreast in various areas of our life, be it professional, physical, emotional, mental, psychological, or spiritual.
To be energized and fulfilled, playing to win can cut in many ways. It does not always mean to down our opponent, but to win in our personal growth, strengthening our mental health, and better managing our emotions. Long-time successful investors would tell you that you are not to beat the market but manage your own emotions and reactions to the market. According to Peter Lynch, a legendary fund manager, “the real key of making money in stocks is not to get scared out of them.”[2] Hence, beating the market is to win over our ego and fear, tantamount to taking a walk into our inner journey. Rather than winning from external competition, how about competing to be a “better me” today than yesterday? We are our own ultimate competitor. In competing with oneself, our potential and goodness are not limited by an opponent. We are free to dream who we inspire to be, not bounded by our parents and society, and of course, not the social media. Simon Sinek once said, “we achieve more when we chase the dream instead of the competition.”[3]
In my pursuit of personal growth, I experience that the more I learn, the more I do not know, particularly in knowing-thy-self and spiritually, where the sphere is boundless and infinite, the mystery of God. Interestingly, it does not frustrate me. Instead, it humbles me with peace and harmony, shoving me into “the cloud of unknowing.” That is my game in the life of playing to win.
Where is the playing field in your life, and how have you been performing? At this beginning of the year, perhaps it is time to take stock and look into your personal growth and inner journey.
[1] John Caudwell: Love Pain and Money, n.d., chapter 3 according to the audiobook.
[2] Peter Lynch, Beating the Street (Simon and Schuster, 2012), 36.
[3] Simon Sinek [@simonsinek], “We Achieve More When We Chase the Dream Instead of the Competition.,” Tweet, Twitter, November 1, 2021, https://twitter.com/simonsinek/status/1455152141190959104.